Anyone who finds themselves in the process of getting divorced understandably wants the process over as quickly as possible. Without the proper legal guidance, the desire to get it over and done with can result in hasty decisions that have a lasting impact. Here we outline five common divorce mistakes.
Assuming that the divorce severs your financial ties
Many people assume that once the final order (formerly the decree absolute) is received, that they are automatically financially free from their ex-spouse. Legally, this is not the case. You need to apply for a financial order or a clean break order to ensure any financial obligations are cut. If you don’t do this, claims can be made at any time in the future – even decades later.
Overlooking Pensions
It’s a common misconception that you are not entitled to a share of your spouse’s pension in a divorce settlement. Women, in particular, are often too quick to take the family home in a settlement and ignore their ex-husband’s pension. That’s understandable: the home provides much-needed security, especially when children are involved. However, if you have stepped back from a career to raise your children, and your own pension contributions have been diminished, this needs to be taken into account in any divorce settlement.
Involving Children in your disputes
Divorce is emotionally difficult, even when both parties work constructively. In divorces where infidelity is the cause, some people view the divorce proceedings as a way to get back at their partner. It is vital to protect your children from emotional harm and not involve them in any arguments or discussions designed to influence them into taking a side.
Relying on advice from family and friends
The saying that you find out who your true friends are in a time of need could well have originated during a divorce. Common friends may feel, or even choose to, take sides. Other friends may not know what to say to you so avoid having contact. Conversely, family and friends may have been through a divorce themselves. This is great for emotional support and having someone who will listen without judging you. However, their experience should never replace impartial legal advice. As your solicitor, our focus is as much on the new life you plan to build after your divorce as it is on helping you through the process.
Going Straight to court
Many people think that having their day in court is the only way to resolve their issues. Some view it as a way to shame the actions of their former spouse. Mediation is a far less stressful and cost-effective way of keeping your disputes out of court. Going to court should always be the last resort.